The Case of the Most Expensive Coin Collection

Here at Asteroid G we're fans of heist films. A good heist can suck you into the story, make you thrill as the team breaks their way into whatever location they're stealing from, make you feel joy when they get away with their scheme. The trick of a good heist, though, is that you have to care about the team -- a heist perpetrated by a bunch of criminals because they want to steal doesn't have the same impact as a team of guys (and gals) stealing something (money, stocks, antiquities) to screw over someone that wronged them. Motivation, in short, is key.

I thought about all this quite a bit while watching The Vault, a recently released Spanish-made heist flick streaming currently on NetflixOriginally started as a disc-by-mail service, Netflix has grown to be one of the largest media companies in the world (and one of the most valued internet companies as well). With a constant slate of new internet streaming-based programming that updates all the time, Netflix has redefined what it means to watch TV and films (as well as how to do it). (although it's not actually Netflix production). This film has all of the hallmarks of a proper heist flick: a team of personable actors, slick production values, and a caper that takes setup and proper planning leading to the potential for many thrills. What it lacks, though, is proper motivation for the characters; while they certainly feel wronged and want to steal back "what's theirs", the film makes it pretty clear that what the team is doing is just petty theft (even if that wasn't the intention). As such it's just hard to care if the gang gets away with their scheme and that drains a lot of the fun out of the film.

Walter (Liam Cunningham), captain of a salvage crew, has finally found the key piece of a long treasure hunt he's been on: a small chest with the coins of Sir Francis Drake, a privateer for England who supposedly etches onto the coins the location of a vast treasure he buried. Unforrunately for Walter and his salvage crew, as soon as they get said chest the Spanish Coast Guard arrives on the scene and claims the chest (and everything else they unearthed in the operation) for Spain. It seems that Walter didn't get authorization to perform salvage operations off the coast of Spain (where they were), nor did they have any authorizing contract to be there. The chest is claimed by Spain and even the courst side with the country over Walter. What's a rich guy who's had his new toy stolen away supposed to do?

In Walter's case the best thing he can think of is to corrupt an engineering student. Thom (Freddie Highmore), just graduated university with absolutely astounding marks and every rich corporation is absolutely willing to throw money at him. He wants to change the world, though, or at least do something more interesting than a basic corporate job. Walter, though, intrigues him with a simple job: break into the Bank of Spain which has the largest, most impenitrable vault ever made. It would take an absolute genius to pull it off but, thankfully, Thom is just that genius for the task.

So yeah, my first issue with the film is that Walter and his crew -- second in command James (Sam Riley), con artist Lorraine (Astrid Berges-Frisbey), hacker Klaus (Axel Stein), and logistics expert Gustavo (Jose Coronado) -- have no legal claim to their salvage. They are, in effect, already criminals because they were operating off the coast of Spain when they shouldn't have been there. Whatever else the film tries to tell us (tell, not show) about Walter's "claim" -- how he's been searching for it for years, how this is his dream heist -- the fact is that this crew wasn't actually wronged. They shouldn't have been off the coast of Spain. End of story.

That issue is actually only made worse by a later detail we learn: Walter is already stupidly wealthy. He throws around money like its no big deal, and says the treasure hunt isn't for the money as he's already been very successful in his life. This then paints the heist not as something the team needs to accomplish to survive but, instead, as a lark, a rich man's idle fantasy so he can scratch another thing off his bucket list. That's terrible motivation for a heist.

This is then complicated further by the fact that Thom, the young engineer who becomes the closest we have to an audience surrogate in this world of criminals and crimes, is the worst kind of self-insert Marty Stu I think I've ever seen. The film makes Thom central to every aspect of the heist because he's a "genius", and every time a problem comes up Thom is the one to solve it (even though there's a whole team of people there for the heist). The film makes Thom magical, in essence, always able to solve every problem simply by thinking about it. Were his influence limited to just cracking the vault that would be fine but Thom shows up all over this film, solving every problem and getting his genius germs all over the film. He's too perfect, too smart, to be a worthwhile character.

Thing is, with the right team and the right motivation this caper could have actually been pretty good. The concept of the vault, and 75 year old machine that has alluded all criminals, is a pretty solid setup. It's not protected by lasers or explosives or anything like that but solid, classic engineering. It would be interesting to see a colorful cast of characters attempting to tackle this device, and get away with the loot, without anyone being able to stop them. That kind of film would be great.

But the cast we get isn't a solid substitute for the likes of Dany Ocean and his Eleven. Where a film like Ocean's Eleven gave us a colorful cast of characterws that could banter back and forth and have fun pulling off a scheme, The Vault lacks the humor, and the charisma, to pull off the same feat. There's honestly too much focus on the titular vault and not enough time spent letting us get to know the characters. Everyone in this film is just so flat and uninteresting that you never care about them at all.

It just gets us back to the realization that good caper films are hard to pull off. Do it right and you get a colorful film full of zest as criminals stick it to the man (or the system) and get away with the money they need. But in the wrong hands you end up with a flat cast of characters you never care about pulling off a scheme that doesn't matter at all. It doesn't take a genius, like Thom, to make a good heist film but, clearly, the wrong hands were applied to The Vault. This is a leaden film that things it's smarter and better than other capers. It may be smarter but it's not even in the same league as other, better heist films.

On the scale of caper flicks The Vault ranks much closer to the Ocean's 11 from 1960 than Ocean's Eleven from 2001. It might have slick production values for the later but its much closer in tone, and listlessness, to the former and that's not a comparison any heist film should make.